I built a fortress, with a hundred thousand faces,
I'll keep it safe, with a hundred thousand more.
But these masks are wearing thin, as You draw me in.
I spent my time on the empty and the fleeting.
I spent my life on much less than what I'd dreamed.
But I'm reaching out to You, to make me new.
'Cause I am just a beggar, here at Your door.
I am just a shipwreck here on Your shore.
I come empty handed, ready to see,
Your life in me changing who I've been,
To who I need to be.
You tell my story as You sift between the pages.
I feel redemption in the space between each turn.
Could You take me in Your arms,
And tell it just once more?
Could You take me in Your arms,
And tell it just once more?
'Cause I am just a beggar, here at Your door.
I am just a shipwreck here on Your shore.
I come empty handed, ready to see,
Your life in me changing who I've been,
To who I need to be.
I sit here and in my hands I hold my "employment agreement package" that I have to sign and give back to the head honcho here at the ranch. With every pen stroke I do more than just sign my life away for 3 months of scrubbing toilets here at Timberline- I resign my hopes and my desires to the true king. In a sense I turn my back on my parents and I jump, with everything that I am, into the unknown. I'm so scared--- and soooo tired! I have been here for the past 10 weeks, cleaning and vacuuming, running on about 6 hours of sleep a night and I feel part dead. I've past the point of physical exhaustion and I've hit spiritual exhaustion. God is soooo good because only He is carrying me through this. I'm soooo scared, but I know that God will show up and I will trust that He is faithful. It feels like this is the first time in my life that I have thrown caution to the wind and have allowed God's voice to be the reason in my life. I am nothing more than a servant, and He is my king. It is Him I serve and no one else.
**Lord Jesus, hold me and catch me as I jump. You are my king and I love you. I will praise you because you have been so good to me. Restore my spirit and give me rest. My life is yours. I know that you will guide me. Banish my fears and lift me up so that I can see your goodness and see where you are guiding me. Hold me tight, here I go!!**
1 comment:
hey girl! You can do it! :) and CBC next year is going to be the most incredible time in both of our lives, I mean think about it... we're taking the same program!!! We can most likly do our internship at the same time! And live out our dreams to be missionaries in the world somewhere together!!!!!, whether or not one of us, both of us, or neither of us are full time or part time! This is the scariest yet, most amazing time in our lives and I honestly CAN NOT WAIT! to experience every step of this awesome God-mission-journey/adventure with you by my side... YOU ROCK MY WORLD! YOU ARE MY BESTEST FRIEND EVER! I LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH! **Hugz** :)
ps. sisters in Christ forever! **heehee**
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